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My name is Lucas - I'm new to the forum. I've been in recovery (AA and DA) for some years now, but only recently have come to see just how much of an ACA I am... 'Approval addiction' and fear of disapproval and abandonment have always been huge issues in my life.. in many ways they are like core or defining traits for me... and I want to overcome them and be free... My mother was a drug addict, my father was absent and I also suffered physical and psychological abuse by a carer who was... guess what.. an alcoholic... sooo... no wonder I belong here..
I can say that I've made a great deal of progress, thanks to good 12 step sponsors, therapists and a heady dose of courage and determination, in challenging my fears and building my self worth. It's taken a long time.. I'm 46 now.. but it's taught me that real transformation is possible... I used to be so afraid of people, of being seen, of being dispproved of, that it was completely debilitating... after many years of work on myself, that person so crippled with fear is almost unrecognisable to me, and I can today do things and feel comfortable in situations that were once completely impossible for me..
But I still have a long way to go, and I still have a lot to learn... this I know... so I hope I can continue my journey with you all, and share in your journeys too... Thank you so so much for being here... when I read the Laundry List, I finally knew I was home..
Welcome, Lucas and Devo_t. Glad that you found us! Lucas, I understand that feeling about reading the Laundry List. I felt much the same the first time I read it.