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As Co-Moderators, mamalioness and I are trying to re-energize this site and attract new members. We have several outreach initiatives, and would like to know which ones are working.
How did you find out about this site?
We hope you join our experience, strength, and hope!
LOTS of great love and healing on our site...Glad you all are here and when you are ready, on the top right, there is a button you can tap and register and be all over this great place....Lots of daily readers, shares, just good stuff!!!! Hope to see you all soon!!! HUGS
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ROSIE, a work in progress!!!
Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown
WEll for what it is worth, I even "tweeted" about us, LOL, but it would be GREAT if you all would tell us how you found us...
We are working hard to build up the group...great shares, good recovery literature...daily stuff to post on, cogitate on and HECK!! I read the shares and walk away each day a wiser person
Don't EVER think, because you may be new that you have nothing to offer...Some of my greatest "light bulb" moments have come from the new folks...So please..Never think you got nothing to say...We are listening and we care...
Hope to see you all on the General board where the love is real and the acceptance is unconditional...I don't know what I would do if it weren't for this life saving place
HUGS to all
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ROSIE, a work in progress!!!
Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown
I found this site by searching for ACOA meetings, which led me to adultchildren.org, and this was referenced in some of the online meetings. There actually is a local meeting in my area on Tuesdays, which I plan to attend.
Hi, Im new to this site. I think I found it by looking for online meetings.
Im (sadly and) currently living with my alcoholic mother, and with my 5 year old son. Im nearly 40, and found much aspects of my life falling apart around me. I had an awful relationship with a toxic narcissist last year (one of many toxic relationships Ive been in) and nearly lost my life by suicide. I decided a big change was needed in my life, so I moved (Feb 18) my home and job to enhance my life and get away from bad memories. The job didnt work out and I moved again (Jun 18). Both moves to different cities. The second job had plans of only hiring me for the interim of selling to a new company. I found myself without a job and stayed as long as I could to try to find work. I finally had to move in with my mother. I dreaded it so bad and then thought maybe its not so bad. It took about a month to realize just why I dreaded it so much, but its actually worse than even my dread was. Im currently in therapy and thankful for that. But I cannot stand living with her and I fear my son having to deal with what I do. I keep him away from it as much as I can. Her drinking wasnt bad at first, Im sure because she was being cautious and hiding, and trying to be on her best behavior. But its quickly worsening, and I can feel the mean in the air, see the mean looks, and have even dealt with small mean remarks. Its so incredibly uncomfortable and makes me feel like a child again. I fear her doing this to my son. But Im in no position to get my own place. Im not even sure I can handle a full time job right now. I was a Property Manager for Apartments and that career has left a sour taste with me. Ive been pondering returning to college and pursuing something better suited to me. I just dont know what to do. But this isnt healthy for either of us. I feel like I teeter back and forth in my moods, sometimes okay and hopeful, but sometimes downright full of despair.
My therapist recommended me finding meetings, but I cannot leave my sone with her at night for obvious concerns. So I found this site. I hope to converse and gain insight, and not feel so alone anymore.
Carey
Dear CareBehr. I was a mess when I came here nearly 15 years ago. I was also a suicide risk who tried to commit suicide a few times before I got into recovery. I worked my program as suggested and shared and I look at me now and look at me before recovery and I cannot believe the good changes. You can heal and recover and change your life to with this miracle program. Please come join us and receive the love and acceptance That you deserve. We are here and we are listening
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ROSIE, a work in progress!!!
Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown
Thank you so much for your responses and it does make me feel just a tiny bit better. Ive found a Facebook group that I thought might help, but they are very selective in who they respond to. Ive felt more alone there than I have without it. I think Ill stick with you guys!!
Thanks for your efforts on this forum. I found out about your forum through adultchildren.org. I found ACOA on a church website that hosts several anonymous meetings and then searched for the ACOA website. I had been considering Al-Anon or CoDA, but after reading the promises, I felt this aligned most with my goals and needs.
I am hoping to start a local meeting this week, but I thought the forum would be helpful when I need a boost in the day. One of my biggest challenges right now is loneliness and isolation. I hope to work through my people issues and build up my confidence through this program and figure out how to have some fun along the way. :)
-- Edited by Orange on Monday 25th of February 2019 04:22:52 PM
-- Edited by Orange on Monday 25th of February 2019 04:23:19 PM
My wife recommended I look for a local chapter of ACA, but the closest one was quite a distance away. So I looked on the Adultchildren.org and found this forum. Since none of the other, face to face online meetings were at times I could do, I thought it might be a good place to start my search for help.
-- Edited by tomatkins1955 on Wednesday 24th of April 2019 06:53:49 AM
I heard about ACA this morning when listening to a recovery podcast this morning. I began google searches and after a few clicks I landed here. I'm so glad I did. I've checked to see if there are any physical meetings near me, and there are not. So, I'm really excited for this on-line group. Thank you.
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April
"We were entirely ready to begin the healing process with the aid of our Higher Power" Tony A's Step 6
I also found this website through a meeting search on adultchildren.org.
I am not new to ACA, I attended a meeting for a year about five years ago, but I was also in therapy, and in another support group. I couldn't do all three, and I needed the specialized support from the other group more. I left knowing I would return when I was in a place to dive-in on my family of origin work.
I chose this group because I am an introvert and I work a high demand customer service job (which I'm hoping to leave soon) so I don't have the energy for an in-person group at the moment. I have been a long-time member of other online groups, and I process my feelings better in writing as opposed to verbally, so I think this group might be a better fit for me long-term than an in-person group.
I look forward to getting to know you all better and healing!
I found you through adultchildren.org also and looking forward to the gems of info and experience I hope to glean. There are very few meetings in my area and the ones that do meet are at inconvenient times so there's that. The other side of that is I'm not sure I'm ready to become transparent in front of physical people. I've been a master of disguise for so long now to the point of fooling myself into believing that all the books I've read, all the counseling I did years ago, plus my faith had "fixed" me. I was good, solid, my life was better, blah, blah, blah and then I woke only to discover that I'm still the same old girl stuck in the same old place, just older, much older. So here I am, step one of reaching out beyond arms length...time to take the mask off...for good.
Julie D.
9/11/19
-- Edited by jhook2 on Wednesday 11th of September 2019 04:08:50 PM
I found your site after it was mentioned in a book I am reading (Bradshaw On: The Family by John Bradshaw). When he mentioned ACOA, it sparked hope in me and I went searching and found this site via a Facebook search.
My personal story is probably not far off from many others out there. Now, I have 2 small children and I am determined that they will not have my childhood. I'm on a quest to heal and grow myself, not just for my own sanity and self, but for them too.
I found this site through the ACA WSO website. I have been to a few face 2 face meetings and enjoy the support very much. I am part of another 12 step fellowship (which is what eventually led me to this fellowship) and have an online email group of women I find very beneficial for me. I am a mother, wife, undergraduate student, only child of a disabled mother and so much more that keeps me busy so online meetings are great for me in those times getting to a face 2 face seems like a headache. I look forward to being part of this community.
I am really grateful to see so many new faces joining our family. Lots of love and healing are yours for the taking here on this group. This group literally saved my life
__________________
ROSIE, a work in progress!!!
Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown
I found this group site by search results for meetings at adultchildren.org
Glad you found us
__________________
ROSIE, a work in progress!!!
Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown
A friend in AA told me about the program, she attends meetings, however,because of my job I cannot get to the one meeting that is available. She gave me the website info.
hey Cindy, you're going to love it here...lots of support and love and healing...Literally, this community saved my life...BIG welcome to you
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ROSIE, a work in progress!!!
Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown
I found you while searching for online meetings on ACA WSO. I attended meetings years ago in my twenties. Now in my sixties my "reactions" to grief and trauma remind me why I need this support system. Thank you for being here.
How I found you guys is actually a really interesting story. In my current psychology class for extra credit, we are to review a self-help book and I choose the book Adult Children: The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families. I found you guys while looking up information on this subject and realized that I want to work on me and make my life better since I am an adult child of an alcoholic mother who unfortunately passed away in November 2018 from complications of her alcoholism.
after years in recovery in another program i was still feeling bad about myself. i felt a deep sense if shame and low self worth. and depression too. i started therapy. and then one day a friend in that other program told me about ACA. i read the BRB, the literature, read the daily meditations, did a few meetings on ITR and am hoping to work the program with a fellow traveler/sponsor. I am a product of a broken home and family dysfunction and one of the things i found striking in the affirmations of ACA was that it was Ok to think things differently from my family. I don't want it to be true that depression is a family gene. Right now, I live close to my dad, who is and was one the major causes of our family dysfunction and i know from my therapist that I must distance myself from his presence ( i still feel like an inadequate child in his presence and i feel surging anger every morning at the thought that i am stuck living next door to him). I cannot move out just yet cos I am not doing so great in the earning money department just yet and also fear and guilt of leaving the family protection, and him in particular, are preventing me from taking meaningful steps. However Im happy I made it here and to the other online meetings and really hope to heal. Want to heal. I sometimes feel, like the Bradshaw books says, I am shame.
I want that to go. Id appreciate the help and support. And hope to find a fellow traveler or a sponsor to start me off on my journey. If there is anyone, please tell me what to do.
I found you in the midst of a 35-day lockdown here in South Africa. I am part of a very small ACA group here that only started about 6 weeks ago. We are 1 of only a handful in SA. I was looking online for any other online meetings with times that may be convenient to bolster me along my journey and came across this Forum :)