Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families

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Post Info TOPIC: How Did You Find Us?


Member

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How Did You Find Us?


As Co-Moderators, mamalioness and I are trying to re-energize this site and attract new members.  We have several outreach initiatives, and would like to know which ones are working.

How did you find out about this site?

We hope you join our experience, strength, and hope! 

In Recovery,

Princess K.



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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Thank you Princess K...

LOTS of great love and healing on our site...Glad you all are here and when you are ready, on the top right, there is a button you can tap and register and be all over this great place....Lots of daily readers, shares, just good stuff!!!! Hope to see you all soon!!! HUGS

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ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



Newbie

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Posts: 1
Date:

Thank you mamalioness and Princess K. This is my very first ACA meeting interaction and I look forward to recovering with your help.

Keithia

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Keithia Armand


Member

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Welcome to MIP, Keithia! 

Where did you find our site?

Please register as a member to see our shares, daily readings, and other good stuff!!  Look forward to sharing our recovery journey with you.

In Recovery,

Princess K.

 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

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Posts: 1
Date:

I somehow found this site while searching for ACA meetings in my area.

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Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome, lady sistar! 

Was that through the ACA World Service Organization, or just a search?  Good for us to know these things!

In Recovery,

Princess K.



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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Posts: 17550
Date:

WEll for what it is worth, I even "tweeted" about us, LOL, but it would be GREAT if you all would tell us how you found us...

We are working hard to build up the group...great shares, good recovery literature...daily stuff to post on, cogitate on and HECK!! I read the shares and walk away each day a wiser person

Don't EVER think, because you may be new that you have nothing to offer...Some of my greatest "light bulb" moments have come from the new folks...So please..Never think you got nothing to say...We are listening and we care...

Hope to see you all on the General board where the love is real and the acceptance is unconditional...I don't know what I would do if it weren't for this life saving place

HUGS to all

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



Member

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Posts: 13
Date:

I found this site by searching for ACOA meetings, which led me to adultchildren.org, and this was referenced in some of the online meetings.  There actually is a local meeting in my area on Tuesdays, which I plan to attend.



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Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Great to know; thanks for the info., intothesea!

In Recovery,

Princess K.



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

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Posts: 3
Date:

I found this website of of another ACOA website that my therapist recommended. I look forward to the insight. 



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Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome to MIP, ZoeeJane! 

Was that the ACA World Service Organization site?

I look forward to getting to know you!  Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope! 

In Recovery,

Princess K.



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 3
Date:

I'm not sure how to exactly navigate this site...admittedly. and yes it was. Thank you


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Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Thanks ZoeeJane, good to know! 

When you log in, you will see three Forums.  This is the second one, which is visible to anyone.

Our personal shares are in the first Forum, which is only visible to members.  The third Forum is for business.

Hope to see more of you!

In Recovery,

Princess K.



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

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Posts: 3
Date:

Hi, Im new to this site. I think I found it by looking for online meetings. Im (sadly and) currently living with my alcoholic mother, and with my 5 year old son. Im nearly 40, and found much aspects of my life falling apart around me. I had an awful relationship with a toxic narcissist last year (one of many toxic relationships Ive been in) and nearly lost my life by suicide. I decided a big change was needed in my life, so I moved (Feb 18) my home and job to enhance my life and get away from bad memories. The job didnt work out and I moved again (Jun 18). Both moves to different cities. The second job had plans of only hiring me for the interim of selling to a new company. I found myself without a job and stayed as long as I could to try to find work. I finally had to move in with my mother. I dreaded it so bad and then thought maybe its not so bad. It took about a month to realize just why I dreaded it so much, but its actually worse than even my dread was. Im currently in therapy and thankful for that. But I cannot stand living with her and I fear my son having to deal with what I do. I keep him away from it as much as I can. Her drinking wasnt bad at first, Im sure because she was being cautious and hiding, and trying to be on her best behavior. But its quickly worsening, and I can feel the mean in the air, see the mean looks, and have even dealt with small mean remarks. Its so incredibly uncomfortable and makes me feel like a child again. I fear her doing this to my son. But Im in no position to get my own place. Im not even sure I can handle a full time job right now. I was a Property Manager for Apartments and that career has left a sour taste with me. Ive been pondering returning to college and pursuing something better suited to me. I just dont know what to do. But this isnt healthy for either of us. I feel like I teeter back and forth in my moods, sometimes okay and hopeful, but sometimes downright full of despair. My therapist recommended me finding meetings, but I cannot leave my sone with her at night for obvious concerns. So I found this site. I hope to converse and gain insight, and not feel so alone anymore. Carey

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Member

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Date:

Welcome to MIP, CareBehr! 

I think ACA literature and this site can help you understand what you are going through, and that there is hope for a better life!

Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope!

In Recovery,

Princess K.

 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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Posts: 17550
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Dear CareBehr. I was a mess when I came here nearly 15 years ago. I was also a suicide risk who tried to commit suicide a few times before I got into recovery. I worked my program as suggested and shared and I look at me now and look at me before recovery and I cannot believe the good changes. You can heal and recover and change your life to with this miracle program. Please come join us and receive the love and acceptance That you deserve. We are here and we are listening

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



Newbie

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Posts: 3
Date:

Thank you so much for your responses and it does make me feel just a tiny bit better. Ive found a Facebook group that I thought might help, but they are very selective in who they respond to. Ive felt more alone there than I have without it. I think Ill stick with you guys!!

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Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Great, CareBehr! 

There are many tools of recovery; use whatever works for you!

I have privacy concerns about facebook; we observe confidentiality here.

In Recovery,

Princess K.

 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 3236
Date:

Thanks for your efforts on this forum. I found out about your forum through adultchildren.org. I found ACOA on a church website that hosts several anonymous meetings and then searched for the ACOA website. I had been considering Al-Anon or CoDA, but after reading the promises, I felt this aligned most with my goals and needs.

I am hoping to start a local meeting this week, but I thought the forum would be helpful when I need a boost in the day. One of my biggest challenges right now is loneliness and isolation. I hope to work through my people issues and build up my confidence through this program and figure out how to have some fun along the way. :)



-- Edited by Orange on Monday 25th of February 2019 04:22:52 PM



-- Edited by Orange on Monday 25th of February 2019 04:23:19 PM

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Member

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Date:

Welcome, Orange!!

Good luck with your local meeting!  There are a lot of meeting resources on the adultchildren.org site.

Pull up a chair and join our family! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Recovering Adult Child

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Welcome, Orange! :D

ACA is an awesome program; it really works wonders!

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Not my circus, not my monkeys

My 12 Steps Responses 

Codependent Thinking vs. Boundary-Led Thinking

5 Boundaries You Need  

Seven Principles for Self Care Practice



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 3
Date:

I googled "adult children of alcoholics" and found this site. =)

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Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Glad you found us, Cloud!! 



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 4
Date:

My wife recommended I look for a local chapter of ACA, but the closest one was quite a distance away. So I looked on the Adultchildren.org and found this forum. Since none of the other, face to face online meetings were at times I could do, I thought it might be a good place to start my search for help.



-- Edited by tomatkins1955 on Wednesday 24th of April 2019 06:53:49 AM

__________________

The Poet



Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Glad you found us, tomatkins! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 7
Date:

My wife suggested I look up the Adult Children of Alcohlics group and I found there were no groups near me, so I am trying this on line group. 



__________________
The Poet


Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

I did the same when I moved to the sticks with no ACA meetings.  This is a great alternative!

Welcome to the family!!



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1610
Date:

I heard about ACA this morning when listening to a recovery podcast this morning. I began google searches and after a few clicks I landed here. I'm so glad I did. I've checked to see if there are any physical meetings near me, and there are not. So, I'm really excited for this on-line group. Thank you.

__________________

April 

"We were entirely ready to begin the healing process with the aid of our Higher Power"  Tony A's Step 6



Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Glad you found us, April!

James chairs an online meeting on Tuesdays, maybe you can make it!



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 1
Date:

I also found this website through a meeting search on adultchildren.org.

I am not new to ACA, I attended a meeting for a year about five years ago, but I was also in therapy, and in another support group. I couldn't do all three, and I needed the specialized support from the other group more. I left knowing I would return when I was in a place to dive-in on my family of origin work.

I chose this group because I am an introvert and I work a high demand customer service job (which I'm hoping to leave soon) so I don't have the energy for an in-person group at the moment. I have been a long-time member of other online groups, and I process my feelings better in writing as opposed to verbally, so I think this group might be a better fit for me long-term than an in-person group.

I look forward to getting to know you all better and healing!

__________________


Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome to MIP!!!

We have several introverts in this group, including myself.

Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 1
Date:

I found you through adultchildren.org also and looking forward to the gems of info and experience I hope to glean. There are very few meetings in my area and the ones that do meet are at inconvenient times so there's that. The other side of that is I'm not sure I'm ready to become transparent in front of physical people. I've been a master of disguise for so long now to the point of fooling myself into believing that all the books I've read, all the counseling I did years ago, plus my faith had "fixed" me. I was good, solid, my life was better, blah, blah, blah and then I woke only to discover that I'm still the same old girl stuck in the same old place, just older, much older. So here I am, step one of reaching out beyond arms length...time to take the mask off...for good.

Julie D.

9/11/19



-- Edited by jhook2 on Wednesday 11th of September 2019 04:08:50 PM

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Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome to the family, Julie!

I live in the sticks and there are no ACA meetings nearby.  Online is the next best thing!

Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

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Posts: 2
Date:

I found your site after it was mentioned in a book I am reading (Bradshaw On: The Family by John Bradshaw). When he mentioned ACOA, it sparked hope in me and I went searching and found this site via a Facebook search.
My personal story is probably not far off from many others out there. Now, I have 2 small children and I am determined that they will not have my childhood. I'm on a quest to heal and grow myself, not just for my own sanity and self, but for them too.

__________________
J.H.


Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome to MIP, RedHorizon! 

Love Bradshaw, and Healing the Shame That Binds Us!

Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 1
Date:

I found this site through the ACA WSO website. I have been to a few face 2 face meetings and enjoy the support very much. I am part of another 12 step fellowship (which is what eventually led me to this fellowship) and have an online email group of women I find very beneficial for me. I am a mother, wife, undergraduate student, only child of a disabled mother and so much more that keeps me busy so online meetings are great for me in those times getting to a face 2 face seems like a headache. I look forward to being part of this community.

__________________

Raksha- Wolf mother of a man cub

(from the Jungle Book)



Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome to MIP, Raksha! 

I hope to see you on our Forum and Tuesday night meeting!



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

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Posts: 2
Date:

I found the forum through ACA world service too.

__________________


Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome, Eala!  So glad you found us!! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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Posts: 17550
Date:

I am really grateful to see so many new faces joining our family. Lots of love and healing are yours for the taking here on this group. This group literally saved my life

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 34
Date:

I found this group via the ACA web site. I emailed the contact person who gave me the link on how to join.

__________________


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 24
Date:

I found this group site by search results for meetings at adultchildren.org

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Best Regards,

Kirsten



Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Thanks for the info. flagship, and welcome!! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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Posts: 17550
Date:

flagship2020 wrote:

I found this group site by search results for meetings at adultchildren.org


 Glad you found us  biggrinbiggrinbiggrinbiggrin



__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 2
Date:

A friend in AA told me about the program, she attends meetings, however,because of my job I cannot get to the one meeting that is available. She gave me the website info.

__________________
Cindy Sanders


Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Glad you found us, Cindy!

Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

Status: Offline
Posts: 17550
Date:

hey Cindy, you're going to love it here...lots of support and love and healing...Literally, this community saved my life...BIG welcome to you

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1610
Date:

Hi Cindy.  It's nice to meet you.   Welcome!



__________________

April 

"We were entirely ready to begin the healing process with the aid of our Higher Power"  Tony A's Step 6



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 1
Date:

I found you while searching for online meetings on ACA WSO. I attended meetings years ago in my twenties. Now in my sixties my "reactions" to grief and trauma remind me why I need this support system. Thank you for being here.

__________________


Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome to the family, DazyChild! 

There are several of us recycled teenagers here! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1610
Date:

Hi DazyChild!

 

Welcome.  It's nice to have you with us.  



__________________

April 

"We were entirely ready to begin the healing process with the aid of our Higher Power"  Tony A's Step 6



Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 23
Date:

Surfing the web for things to help myself

__________________


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 21961
Date:

Thanks Kate, good to know!



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 2
Date:

I found you in the ACA webpage :)

And I have a question:

Could I post my yellow book Step Work Answers somewhere on this board?

I'd like to share them with other adult Children as well as (hopefully) read their own answers!

Thank you all for your wonderful service,
Nuria Glass

__________________
Nuria Glass A human doing it's best in this adventure called life :)


Member

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Posts: 21961
Date:

Welcome to MIP, nuria!

Yes, we welcome members sharing their Step journey.  We give each other experience, strength, and hope!



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 1
Date:

How I found you guys is actually a really interesting story. In my current psychology class for extra credit, we are to review a self-help book and I choose the book Adult Children: The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families. I found you guys while looking up information on this subject and realized that I want to work on me and make my life better since I am an adult child of an alcoholic mother who unfortunately passed away in November 2018 from complications of her alcoholism.

__________________
B. Dolan


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 21961
Date:

Glad you found us, Billy! 

Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope!!



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 2
Date:

after years in recovery in another program i was still feeling bad about myself. i felt a deep sense if shame and low self worth. and depression too. i started therapy. and then one day a friend in that other program told me about ACA. i read the BRB, the literature, read the daily meditations, did a few meetings on ITR and am hoping to work the program with a fellow traveler/sponsor. I am a product of a broken home and family dysfunction and one of the things i found striking in the affirmations of ACA was that it was Ok to think things differently from my family. I don't want it to be true that depression is a family gene. Right now, I live close to my dad, who is and was one the major causes of our family dysfunction and i know from my therapist that I must distance myself from his presence ( i still feel like an inadequate child in his presence and i feel surging anger every morning at the thought that i am stuck living next door to him). I cannot move out just yet cos I am not doing so great in the earning money department just yet and also fear and guilt of leaving the family protection, and him in particular, are preventing me from taking meaningful steps. However Im happy I made it here and to the other online meetings and really hope to heal. Want to heal. I sometimes feel, like the Bradshaw books says, I am shame.

I want that to go. Id appreciate the help and support. And hope to find a fellow traveler or a sponsor to start me off on my journey. If there is anyone, please tell me what to do.


__________________


Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 21961
Date:

Glad you found us, aps!!

I was so enmeshed with my Mom before the ACA Program that I didn't even know it.  Learning about boundaries and setting them took me a while.

I was chronically depressed, and I didn't understand why.  Come to find  out I was programmed that way! 

Fun was for other people.  I could never be good enough.  I was the reason Mom never had a career.

We don't "tell you what to do" here.  We share our experience, strength, and hope.  Each person needs to decide what works for their recovery.

Pull up a chair and join us! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Newbie

Status: Offline
Posts: 1
Date:

I found you in the midst of a 35-day lockdown here in South Africa. I am part of a very small ACA group here that only started about 6 weeks ago. We are 1 of only a handful in SA. I was looking online for any other online meetings with times that may be convenient to bolster me along my journey and came across this Forum :)

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Karen
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