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Post Info TOPIC: Welcome to the ACA program. My story!!


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Welcome to the ACA program. My story!!


When I came here 14 years ago, broken, disillusioned, no hope left, I was literally a mess...

A friend of mine (when I was about to try again to commit suicide) told me  "give ACA 12 steps 30 days...30 days is all I ask, and if it does not help you BE better, THINK better, FEEL better, I won't try and stop you from killing yourself"

I thought "what the heck..30 days more of life?? I can do that, thats not such a long sentence compared with my life sentence of pain, despair, no hope, no love, carved out, spiritually and mentally and emotionally, like a Halloween pumpkin,  sure...I can do this"

well, that was 14 years ago, this past February and as you can see I am very much alive

Programme helped me re-claim my life..It helped me take my power back..It helped me fall in love with myself for the very first time..Programme taught me literally.....HOW to live

No , programme will NOT magically prevent anymore pain and challenges, etc. from coming at you..It will not eliminate the crap storms of life..It will not bring you the knight in shining armour, nor the lady, if you are a man, in red...No it will not make you hit the lottery...

Life is life..the only guarantees we have about life is that it CHANGES..Some wanted/happy...Some unwanted/unhappy...

What the program DOES do for you is teach you how to #1, re-claim yourself and your lost love   #2, set healthy boundaries so people and inanimate things wont' victimize you anymore  #3 change old, bad habits into new, good and healthier habits  #4 give you HOPE from within yourself and the loving universe for a better road ahead

the catch??  All you have to do is make the commitment to yourself and work it..Thats all..The more you give to the program?? The more you will get out of it..You will make new friends and relationships that are real and equal and mutual and healthier...These are just a few of the benefits..

We dont' advertise, we get members by "attraction"  People see me compared to the old me and they want to be where I am at...All the time I see this, and hear this  "Rosie, you have changed sooo much for the better--what is your secret?? what therapist R U seeing????"  I tell them no therapist, just sharing and caring with a bunch of 12 steppers like me who want to live life and live it good...I dont' want to just survive and cope with life...I want to thrive and be at peace with my life.

I am getting there...My life is a journey..Never a destination..this is a lifetime commitment..I did it for me..about me..Because I know I am worth it..

So are you!!!!   Welcome Hugs to all of you



-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 30th of August 2018 01:57:35 PM



-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 15th of November 2018 11:30:09 PM



-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 15th of November 2018 11:40:19 PM

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



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Just thought I would stop in and say "WELCOME" to you all


Well said, mama!    I have seen a lot of positive change in you over the years.

When I first came into ACA I was depressed all of the time, and did not understand why.  That was perfectly normal considering I was taught that fun is a waste of time.  I was told that I couldn't do anything right.  I later found out that my presence on this earth was truly an "accident".

There are many tools of the ACA Program: face-to-face meetings, online meetings, daily readings, books, therapy, sponsorship, etc.  No one tells you how to do this.  Different tools have worked for me at different times.

We only have one authority, a loving Higher Power as you define it.  This is not a religious Program.

My life is so much better in recovery.  I am learning to love myself, and treat myself as well as I do others.  I have set boundaries.  I distance myself from toxic people.  As Rosie said, this is a journey, not a destination!

If your life isn't working and you are ready to make a change, please join us!  Pull up a chair and share our experience, strength, and hope! 

In Recovery,

Princess K.

 



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



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my best friend: the Program: AND "WELCOME" to you all


These Promises of ACA have come true for me!

  1. We will discover our real identities by loving and accepting ourselves.
  2. Our self-esteem will increase as we give ourselves approval on a daily basis.
  3. Fear of authority figures and the need to people-please will leave us.
  4. Our ability to share intimacy will grow inside us.
  5. As we face our abandonment issues, we will be attracted by strengths and become more tolerant of weaknesses.
  6. We will enjoy feeling stable, peaceful, and financially secure.
  7. We will learn how to play and have fun in our lives.
  8. We will choose to love people who can love and be responsible for themselves.
  9. Healthy boundaries and limits will become easier for us to set.
  10. Fears of failure and success will leave us, as we intuitively make healthier choices.
  11. With help from our ACA support group, we will slowly release our dysfunctional behaviors.
  12. Gradually, with our Higher Power help, we will learn to expect the best and get it.

https://adultchildren.org/literature/promises/



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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RE: Welcome to the ACA program. My story!!


Mrs_Snoopy wrote:

These Promises of ACA have come true for me!

  1. We will discover our real identities by loving and accepting ourselves.
  2. Our self-esteem will increase as we give ourselves approval on a daily basis.
  3. Fear of authority figures and the need to people-please will leave us.
  4. Our ability to share intimacy will grow inside us.
  5. As we face our abandonment issues, we will be attracted by strengths and become more tolerant of weaknesses.
  6. We will enjoy feeling stable, peaceful, and financially secure.
  7. We will learn how to play and have fun in our lives.
  8. We will choose to love people who can love and be responsible for themselves.
  9. Healthy boundaries and limits will become easier for us to set.
  10. Fears of failure and success will leave us, as we intuitively make healthier choices.
  11. With help from our ACA support group, we will slowly release our dysfunctional behaviors.
  12. Gradually, with our Higher Power help, we will learn to expect the best and get it.

https://adultchildren.org/literature/promises/


 Ok..Gonna score myself here by the number you listed.....how I'm doing today

#1, I've learned much about myself, still have to work on loving and accepting me and my"bad zones" are when I do somethign dumb out of not being present

#2, still need work on this, but no where NEAR as bad as I was

#3, good progress on this..I can stand up for me, I've even walked out on abusive clients which cost me $$ but the stress was not worth it..I am not people pleaser

#4, sharing here on the boards, being loved and accepted has helped me grow in ability to share intimacy..however, It takes time with me, I want to see consistently that the other is safe

#5, not so scared of being left..if they don't want me?? then I don't want to be where I am not wanted...I love and give my energy to the ones who love me back

#6, fixed income, and PT work, but I still struggle financially...I am more stable, more at peace with who I am

#7 doing REAL good on this one...I can and do play and have fun

#8, my choice of whom I let close to me has greately improved...when I see a toxic person?? I RUN

#9, very good progress on boundaries and standing to them..its one thing to set one..another to stand to it...I've really progressed in this

#10,  not so fearful of messing up, however I will never be a gambler..the percentages have to be in my favor for me to venture into something

#11, little by little I am letting go dysfunctional behaviors, coping skills that do not serve me now, need work but improving

#12..still fearful of the future and outcomes...My expectations are not very high when something is not in my control...need work on this..I don't trust anything outside of me to work on my life.....

 

all in all, I would say I've come far, but I will never be done recovering..it took years for me to get so sick, its going to take a lifetime to , and I won't cure all my problems, but I can learn to manage the ones that I cannot heal...my past was so ugly and dark, that its a shock I am alive , still, but I am and I shall work on me until I am not breathing...I don't want to go to the other side with all this baggage



__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



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Thanks for your share, mama.

I have known you for a long time and I have seen this progress in you!  Progress, not perfection!

I don't think I will ever be "cured", either.  This is a journey, not a destination.  I am certainly better off thanks to the ACA Program!! 

In Recovery,

Princess K.



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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Hey PK, thank you for the thumbs up here. I have seen a lot of good growth in you too. Ive known you for a long time and now I have the pleasure of working with you and I have seen amazing growth in you this past few years

In support, always

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



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Aw, shucks!!  biggrin

In Recovery,

Princess K.



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In Recovery,

Princess K.



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Mrs_Snoopy wrote:

Aw, shucks!!  biggrin

In Recovery,

Princess K.


 LOL. Just speaking the truth



__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



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Thank you for so clearly outlining how you have improved, mamalioness--it's really inspirational! Especially that others can see your genuine contentment and be uplifted by it.



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Theresa Norman


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(((((((((((((Theresa)))))))))) thank you, fellow traveler...This is how I reverse the awful things gone to me...turn it into love for myself and to share and care with others....I am so glad you showed up and are part of us....love your posts.....

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown



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What a story. I am not in nearly as bad a place, but this gives me hope. That is what stories can do. Thank you.

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The Poet


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Welcome to the family, Poet!

We each have our story.  It is said that none of us would trade.

Pull up a chair and join our experience, strength, and hope! 



__________________

In Recovery,

Princess K.



Moderator_in service

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Hey Poet..Just dropping in to say "HEY" and a big welcome...Hope to see ya posting soon, when U R comfy with it.....

__________________

ROSIE,  a work in progress!!! 

Keep it simple__Easy does it__Keeping the focus on me--AND___"Forgiveness doesn't excuse bad behavior, but does prevent bad behavior from destroying your heart" ~ Unknown

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